the more i think about it, the more i think that i spend much to much time on a few certain websites. one of which is sixbillionsecrets.com
it is here that i always submit secrets that i feel someone much understand what i am going through and vote yes to this one. they must see how important it is for me to have someone know. but none of my secrets are ever posted. every time i go to the site, i feel anticipation, then downfall, then fear. Fear that maybe no one cares.
thats how i feel when i go there. and then my downfall and hurt continue after i leave. after i submitted another secret. knowing that there is hardly any chance that this one will be selected and posted. this ritual i do every day really kills my self-esteme. but i don't know what else to do.
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